A Force of Nature

I have had MANY natural disasters in my home lately.

And I have one culprit-

My very own Force of Nature: BRYNN.

And yes, she is KILLING ME,

WEARING ME OUT,

GIVING ME GRAY HAIR (OK, not really, but I am worried),

AND DRIVING ME INSANE.

Yes, children help us learn patience, but they also can make you frustrated and at times angry and once in a while you seriously want to RUN AWAY.

But I stay put.

I and TRY to smile.

And I do love her.

Even after......

She unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper, tossed it all in the toilet and flushed

Shoved a Barbie earring in her ear canal (inducing a panic attack, scramble for Rich's otoscope and serious skills to get it out- which I did)

Dumped an entire salt shaker over the family room end table

Finds packs of gum and chews the whole thing, spitting out the old bits on the carpet,

Colored all over the desk and then broke every crayon in half

Spilled a good cup of oatmeal into the heater vent

Chopped up bills and papers and books with scissors (that were hidden in the cupboard)

Painted her toenails and fingernails all by herself (Augh!)

Cracked my eye shadow into a million pieces

Doused herself with my entire travel size bottle of perfume

Snapped a gold chain in half that went with a diamond pendant Rich gave me for Christmas

Is the ultimate car key thief

Stole my wallet and hid my credit cards behind the desk

Scattered every shoe, doll, blanket, hair clip, diaper and 1/2 the closet onto her floor in under a minute flat

Painted her face, arms and shirt with purple Barbie lipstick,

Scooped cup after cup of laundry soap into the WRONG compartment in the washing machine causing a major mess and an extraordinary amount of bubbles

Jumps off anything she can climb on

Talks back and loves to tell me "NO!"

Teases and attacks Kaitlyn on an hourly basis

Scattered 1/2 a box of Fruity Cheerios on the linoleum and stomped all over them

Sprinkled pepper onto the floor on purpose so she could attempt (key word) to sweep it up

Will NOT stay dressed- ever

Sleeps in princess dresses and jeans

Will not let me do her hair- not a chance

Filled the van full of babies and blankets, toys, bags and cans of pop

Removes her diaper and demands a new one every 30 minutes, but refuses to use the potty full time

Gets naked and tries to get in the tub all day long

Wakes up EVERY night screaming, demanding to sleep in mommy's bed

Drew marks with a red Sharpie all over my favorite mug (oh wait, that was Kaitlyn....)

Snuck nacho cheese and chips to the basement and coated the floor and couch with yellow ooze

And can do all that in 24 HOURS!!

She is stubborn,

and impulsive

and reckless,

and independent,

and..........

just so dang cute.

Good thing.

Otherwise she might be shipped off to Utah to be tamed by the Grandmas.

That is IF they would take her.

But I'll keep her anyway.

Because she loves to give hugs,

blow kisses,

sing songs,

dance and twirl,

giggle and smile,

tickle my back,

says a pretty sincere 'sorry',

and in her prayers blesses Mommy at least ten times.

Yup, she's a keeper.

Even when that crazy light gleams in her eyes and I sense a tornado of activity is just beyond the horizon.

That's my Brynn.

And I'm glad she's mine. (Most of the time....)